a kind of me

i spilled acid on my lot and thought of what i got,
it was ecstatic to start but only tears i bought.
i laughed on myself and heard people cry,
Love...what wouldn't i kill to get another try.

i burned my hands and skinned my knuckle,
when i was sinking i felt life chuckle.
i wanted to see the sun but had my purple haze,
Dad...i am sorry but i ne'er gave into the daze.

i missed my dinner and painted the hidden wall,
am i waiting for you to call?
I am hungry but i can't eat,
Maa...i am still good and swear not a cheat.

i didn't do what i should have,
i just floated with what fate gave.
i don’t have the strength of Hercules, or the wisdom of Solomon,
Me...i'm my worst critic and i will go on...

nonetheless!

deserted and lonely

as a solitary peeble

crunched and punched

and turned away

pain rising high,

...so high

embedded deep into the earth,

by a feet that loved

or so,

i thought

the me inside

in shades of gold and blue, besides...

...torn apart,

like a blank sheet,

with smeared ink

of distant memories

and blots of u*f****ful niceties.

I shall succeed

so be it,

that it never alienates me

from that around me.

May be

the reason explains

the faulty choices i've made

like a flickering flame,

that's struggling,

to burn...

...for air and for life,

to stand up straight.

let me be,

'cause i will have the highest

even if it kills me.